And then there's plan A...

When it comes to planning, I admit I can be more than a bit OCD about it.I write lists for everything-there are two stuck to my fridge now; a 'to do' list for the day, and a meal list for the week! I've had my whole life planned out since the age of ten; and with a few meandering moments from time to time, i have stuck to the general plan: 'A' grade GCSEs, A Levels, dance teaching exams, move to London, Dance college, find a man....


So now, coming up to graduation time I am at the point where I should be embarking on phase two of the master plan. But suddenly, I'm not so sure that I want to. Recently I have had a taste of what it's like to throw away the rule book that I've always lived by...and I liked it. And ever since, a little voice in my head has been saying 'See! See how exciting life can be when you don't know what to expect!' 


So now I'm tempted. Tempted to ditch the planning once and for all and start being impulsive; see where life takes me...


And if that doesn't work out for me then there's always Plan A!

Self-confessed Shopping addict desperately seeks storage!

I recently cleared out my clothes and threw away anything that I hadn’t worn in the last year, anything that didn’t quite fit and anything that looked like it went out of fashion in the 90s (I can’t help it if I still think I’m a spice girl!). The reason for this massive clear out was not because of my love of cleaning (although a good scrub of the bathroom usually does it for me when I’ve had a stressful day or if I’m trying to avoid writing an essay...), it was because I had nowhere to put my lovely new clothes that I got for Christmas.

The suitcase of Christmas pressies had never been unpacked because there quite simply was no room for them. Back when I lived with my parents I had the luxury of a three-door sliding mirror wardrobe as well as a built in closet. One end of the wardrobe had a chest of drawers in, and they all had hanging rails and room on the floor for shoes, and the big built in cupboard, which was assigned to all my dance gear had a hanging rail and storage boxes on the floor. All in all I was quite spoilt for storage space.

When I first moved out it was a shock to have less space for my clothes but I developed a sneaky system where I had two seasonal wardrobes. Whatever was suitable for the current climate would be with me in my wardrobe and the rest stayed at mums. Then when I came home for the holidays I would bring two large suitcases and swap them over. Sorted!

The problem I have now is that I am permanently in London so it’s not so convenient to leave clothes at home. The other problem is that I no longer have a bedroom to myself, which means I don’t have a wardrobe to myself...I have to share the space. This means for all my clothes I have two drawers and half of the small wardrobe! Although I will confess to taking up more like three quarters of that wardrobe through some sneaky rearranging of my fiancé’s clothes when wasn’t there. The dance clothes have be relegated to a storage box on the floor, and shoes have had to be put in a hangable shoe rack on the wall as there is simply no space for them, since I am not willing to part with any of them no matter how old, battered, worn down, scuffed or smelly they may be!

When we do eventually move to somewhere bigger, storage space will be the only thing on my mind when checking out the size of the bedroom, or better yet a walk-in wardrobe would mean no more clear outs (and I really am a hoarder at heart!). 

Man may be a hunter/gatherer but woman is definitely a clothes shopper, and two drawers and half a wardrobe is definitely not enough!! xxx

"You do realise you'll have to be with the same man for the REST OF YOUR LIFE!!"

When I got engaged the news received some mixed reactions. Whilst everybody was happy for me many people were surprised, and some of my friends were visibly shocked. I must admit that after shouting a most definite yes and nearly hugging the poor guy to death my first question was ‘Oh My Goodness! What will my parents say?’ But this worry disappeared when he said ‘Well, they seemed pleased when I asked them.’ My lovely fiancé had asked their permission first!

My parents were more than happy to give their consent but obviously did the concerned parent thing and checked that I had said yes for all the right reasons (love, commitment) and not all the wrong ones (fear of being an old lady with her cats, just wanting to wear a nice dress and have a big party!). Of course I reassured them right away and that was the end of that. With friends however it wasn’t so simple. I cannot count the amount of times I have heard ‘Oh my god, I can’t believe your actually going to get married,’ ‘how old are you?’ and ‘but you’re so young’!

But I can see where they are coming from. At my age most girls are thinking more about cocktail dresses than wedding dresses, and are out partying, not in planning their big day; but I know this is the right decision for me. When friends are discussing their latest dating scandal I don’t worry that I’m missing out or feel jealous, I’m actually quite relieved that I won’t have to sit through anymore awkward bad dates or check my mobile phone every few minutes to see if the boy of the moment has text me back.

Don’t get me wrong, I had plenty of fun when I was doing that, and I certainly never planned on settling down so soon. Since I first moved away from home at 18 to go to university in Liverpool, I have definitely done more than my fare share of drinking and partying, and this only increased when I moved to London. Also, as a fairly early starter I have had enough unsuitable boyfriends to make me sure that this one is ‘the one’.

I don’t think you can put an age on love (after all Romeo and Juliet were mere teens!), and if it feels right, I am a firm believer in trusting your instincts and just going for it. After all, life’s an adventure and if you hold back on things for fear of missing out on something ‘better’, you’ll only end up looking back with regret.

So,’ Oh My God, I can hardly believe I am actually getting married’, but I am so happy that I am, and by the way...I’m only 22, but that’s fine by me! ;) xxx

Less Jam and Jerusalem, more Pimms and Lemonade!

At the age of 22, when you tell people you are a member of the women’s institute you tend to get some funny looks. Eyebrows are raised as thoughts of jam and Jerusalem, old grannies and burn-your-bra feminists pop into people’s minds.  But last year, at the age of 21 I did join the Women’s institute and have been a proud member ever since. And I can tell you that its nothing like you would expect.  The average age of the member of my W.I. group is about 24, with our youngest member just 18!  We are all young girls from around the city; some students, some professionals, some stay-at-homes; all different and unique. I belong to the Shoreditch Sisters.

Founded by former president Jazz Domino-Holly, this is the W.I. that sparked a whole new generation of young women to rethink their ideas, and try it out for themselves. As a result young new branches of the Women’s institute are popping up not just all over London but all over the country with places such as Plymouth getting in on the action. Whilst we do still do the types of things traditionally associated with the W.I. such as knitting, baking and fundraising, this is no O.A.P-fest! Wine and home-baked goodies are usually on hand during meetings and if not there’s always time for drinks afterwards (pimms being a popular choice with us ladies!).

Since joining the W.I. I have made a whole group of new friends, all with similar interests and outlooks on life as me. We are all keen crafters, who like to bake, and try out new recipes. We are keen to fundraise for charities that we are passionate about and like to get behind worthwhile causes such about current campaign against FGM (Female Genital Mutilation, practiced as a religious ‘female circumcision’). In the run up to International Women’s Day, we will be organising and attending a host of events centred on raising awareness about this terrible cultural practice. In the past few months I have learnt more about what it is to consider yourself a feminist in 2011, as well as learning how to make my own Jam, source my own ethical clothing and make my own ‘morsebag’ shopping bag! This month we elected a new president, Secretary and Treasurer for 2011 and I have decided to become part of the committee this as I would like to take more of an active role in the group and am eagerly awaiting the upcoming February committee meeting!

So you see the Women’s Institute is not just for Grannies, and feminists are not  ‘Lesbians with hairy armpits who burn their bras’ as one not so tactful college friend put it!

Anyone interested in joining the Shoreditch Sisters should visit our Facebook page- Shoreshoreditch Sisterhood W.I. or just come along to the next meeting on 22^nd February at Concrete on Shoreditch High Street. Newbies are always welcome. Or if you don’t hail from London Town, check of the Women’s Institute online to find your nearest federation! Happy stitching! xxxx

My favourite things to Do? Drink and Shop of course!!

I mentioned in my first blog about my new favourite London cafe; Drink, Shop & Do. I cannot get enough of the place and wish I had known it was there before! I discovered it in December after being told by a friend about a ‘cool new place where you could order a drink and then sit down and make things’. This sounded like my idea of heaven, as I am always up for a drink (cocktails yum yum!) and I have had a passion for anything crafty since I was tiny. I was not disappointed. I had a look on the website ( http://www.drinkshopdo.com/) and saw that Tuesday was knitting night. Having recently been taught to knit by my mum I was keen to go along, so I grabbed a friend, some wool and my knitting needles and went along!

We grabbed a sofa at the back, ordered a couple of cheeky cocktails from the bar and got to work. There were women (and some men!) of all ages sat around knitting and chatting with friends, all happy to help out of anyone got stuck and keen to share patterns and ideas with others. The atmosphere was fun and buzzing with Christmas crafty cheer!

After a few too many cocktails and not nearly enough knitting I went home very happy and returned again the next evening to try out Crochet. A craft I hadn’t tried before, I put my name down for the beginners session where i paid £5 to be taught the basics, and got my very own crochet hook to take home with me! As it was nearly Christmas we spent the evening making snowflake Christmas tree decorations.  And for a first attempt I was quite pleased with my efforts and will definitely be practicing ready for next year!

 I am now a regular at Drink, Shop & Do, popping in on my lunch breaks and after college for a pot of tea drank from the cutest little cups and saucers (all available to buy from the shop!) and a slice of cake or some sweets. I would recommend it to anyone who enjoys loves to drink, loves to shop, and loves to ‘do’ crafts! So if anyone fancies joining me for a cup of tea anytime soon, you know where to find me! xXx

Size Zero Can Kiss My Ass!!

When choosing a topic for our dissertations we were told to pick something that we were passionate about and that relate directly or indirectly to dance. There was one clear topic that stood out for me to write about and that was Eating Disorders. There's the stereotypical idea of dancers living off celery and tissues; so clearly this was a topic inextricably linked with dance; and with many of my friends either suffering or now recovering from an eating disorder, it is certainly something that I am passionate about. The topic is a highly emotive and complex one, and is not simply a case of 'well she doesn't eat because she's a ballerina and thinks she's fat- she'll snap out of it'. They can be intense life-changing conditions.


Eating disorders can be triggered by psychological factors that have nothing to do with eating or losing weight, such as dealing with abuse or grief. Generally they are to do with the sufferer wanting to feel like they have control over at least one aspect of their lives; if they feel like their lives are spiralling out of their control, at least food is one thing they have total power over. The satisfaction from being told they look great having lost a  few pounds, or the sense of achievement they feel from saying no to that oh so tempting slice of cake can become a powerful addiction that soon becomes so far out of that control they were seeking in the first place. 


Once a person becomes locked into this sort of thinking, the media can become a dangerous weapon against oneself, and this is something that really got to me whilst researching for my dissertation. So taking a step aside from the causes and symptoms of eating disorders, i decided to look more closely at the society we live in. Once I did this I could see just how hard it is for these sufferers to break their vicious cycles of disordered eating.


 It is so easy to get sucked into the diet culture. We are surrounded every single day by glossy images of airbrushed models beaming at us with their perfect white teeth, glowing tans and washboard flat stomachs from billboards, bus stops, the television, and magazine covers. These images of so called perfection encourage us to strive to be like them. Accompanied by adverts for new weight-loss techniques, super diet foods, miracle shakes, gyms and fitness videos, it is no wonder that the average woman is not happy with her body. Ask your girl friends and I bet nearly all of them are either on a diet now or have been at some point in their lives. And of these girls, how many would you consider actually need to lose a few pounds? How many are morbidly obese, obese or just a little overweight? very few i would imagine. How many of us moan about our bodies, put ourselves on a diet of near starvation, fail at it and then binge on chocolate to make ourselves feel better? I know I've done it! I know members of my family and many of my friends have too-male as well as female!


A bad body image makes us self concious and self-centred. Focusing on whether we look ok- 'does my tummy stick out, does my bum look big in this, what does he think when he sees me'. On a night out its not uncommon for a woman to spend more time fretting about what she looks like and how other people perceive her than having a good time with her friends. For this reason I am making a vow from now on to have a good time for the sake of having a good time and not worrying so much about how i look. after all, why should i care? My friends would still be there for me whether i was a size 6 or a size 26. My parents love me for who i am and certainly wont be disowning me for not going to the gym as often as i should. And my fiancé wants to marry me for who I am, not my dress size. 


For all you single girls out there, I know its easier to say that to believe but the right man will love you for your personality, for the wonderful original being that is you no matter how big or small you are. So keep smiling, and live for the moment. And as for me, I cant promise i wont feel guilty after scoffing pizza and pick 'n; mix tomorrow night but I'll be making sure I have a great time while I do! And whilst keeping healthy and fit is important to me as a dancer, the biggest lesson I have learnt from all this dissertation research is that life is too short to count calories. We should be living our dreams not spending our lives dreaming of the foods we wont allow ourselves to have.


So for that reason- Size Zero Can Kiss My Ass xXx

Teacups, Tears and Tapshoes!!

Teacups, Tears and Tapshoes struck me as an appropriate name for a blog as they have been the things that have filled my time and thoughts recently. I am a final year dance student at the London Studio Centre in central London, specialising in musical theatre this year. Its a tough course and we had our tap assessment this week. Tap is what i would usually consider to be my strong point but i just couldn't seem to get to grips with this particular assessment routine and couldn't wait until it was over! Which, thankfully all of my dance assessments now are. 


But there have been tears along the way and I am sure there will be more to come in the lead up to graduation. What with auditions for end of year shows and jobs afterwards, the ever-troublesome dissertation and its imminent deadline, and assessments in acting and the dreaded singing there is plenty coming up in the all too near future to provoke a bout of crying! something that seems to come all too easily!! But a nice cup of tea, fresh from the vintage tea pot usually does the trick when that happens. And i have spent a fair few hours sipping tea recently, with the find of my new favourite venue in London drink,shop and do on Caledonian Road, just around the corner from college! (more about that later!!).


So you see Teacups tears and tapshoes couldn't be more fitting. I tried to get something bridal into the title to make a reference to my wedding which will take place in May next year but nothing quite fitted, and the wedding plans have been slightly put to one side in last few weeks to concentrate on writing my dissertation. After all, given the choice between flicking through bridal magazines or researching eating disorders there's no prizes for guessing which one I would prefer!!! 


I also wanted to make reference to my love of all things cooking and baking related. In the last year I have found a new love for home made food which certainly did not exist during my year in university halls in Liverpool before I moved to London, during which time i survived mainly on Asda smart price potato waffles and baked beans! not the most advanced culinary skills involved in making that I can assure you! sometimes substituted for cheesey chips and chicken nuggets or a 'shiraz' pizza from the takeaway down the road. Almost always washed down with budget priced vodka and mixers or tequila, my student meals left a lot to be desired. recently though its been all about the home made bread, home made jam and lots of varieties of home-baked cakes! from cupcakes to banana loafs and Victoria sponges i have got into baking in a big way. and have also become an expert at casseroles trying out new herbs and spices weekly to create the perfect sauce! a far cry from those cheesy chips hey?!!!